types of bitches

So, for those of you who don't know, I'm an avid blog follower. This has picked up since working in my tiny office during session, when Maryland electeds can't raise money, so we're kind of at a loss for things to do around here. So I read other blogs. A friend sent me this, though, and it has caused some major guffaws in my little cubicle.

Types of Bitches: According to One DC Third Grader

Now, this shit went viral a couple of days ago. I'm not saying I'm the greatest of the blog followers, but I try. Anyway, so this has got me thinking about how timeless this list is. And that, frankly, scares me. I was #37 in third grade, and I am #37 now as I head toward my mid-twenties, and re-wear my green pashmina and navy blue Banana Republic cardigan, and Gap jeans for maybe the third day in a row, give or take the jeans/cardigan (I like to mix and match). But really, #18-21 don't EVER seem to go away. Catty, and bitchy, girls remain. I'm not saying I am just a repeat clothes offender; I sometimes slip into #6, or maybe #12 (in fact, often), and true to my gender, #19.

I had a run-in with some girl friends of mine last month about them being #17 and #18. Now, I'm not trying to be a tryin to apply this list to your elitist college life, BITCH, but I mean, damn, girls with a good vocabulary and five minutes to kill can sure be triflin'.

I was an extraordinarily useless Women's Studies major at my college, and, to be super elitist, what kills me is the fact that these girls are all so-called feminists. And hell, so am I. And I eat this shit up with a spoon. And then I'M the #19 who then posts about it on their stupid blog. Anyway, if it sounds stupid and petty, and a waste of time, it is. Would we all much rather be friends than be right? Well, I think I'd like to be - I often waffle on the imaginary conversations I'd have with them if I had any balls, but I'm a forgiving soul. A girl in my sorority had sex with my ex-boyfriend and we even took a few pictures together a year later at homecoming. Life's too short and shit's too funny not to share with your friends.

Anyway, as petty and empty wisdom goes, this is more of a vent for me. But I'll tell you what, today I talked to some food about it (it's Burger Wednesday at my office, and we went down to the Burger Truck from Kooper's, and I mean, it is a beautiful thing). And, like the Irish who are drowning their sorrows from years of car bombs and religious persecution (and this year the sad lack of clovers) I too will be drowning my sorrows of the preponderance of #79's in my life.

Erin go Bragh, ya'll!